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Stay in Morocco or go to Germany?
D
17 March 2009 08:57
Hello,
Im a teacher of English in Morocco,Im so lost and dont know what to do,my wife is living in Germany and Im living here in Morocco,I want your view point,so do you think I have to go and join my wife and leave Morocco and my job? Is it a good idea or not? Am I going to regret it? Is Germany a good country and thus does it deserve my sacrifice? Did anyone of you make such a step or do you know anyone who did it?
Please help me,any help will be so much appreciated.
Thanks to all of you brothers and sisters.
Salam Alaikom.
w
17 March 2009 10:33
well, i think sooner or later one of you need to make some sort of scarifice since you are married
I don t think it is a good idea that you live far from your wife , marriage is about being together, everyday companionship distance is no good for your relationship so if you think of it this way it will be easy for you to decide

regarding your job: i have visited Germany before , they have high unemployment at the moment but i suggest you need to start looking for a job and sending your application to different schools while you still in Morocco , your qualification as an english teacher in Morocco may be won t be recognized in Germany you need to check on this , and an other thing by law you ll have to learn german language this system now is all over Europe to help immigrants integrate

It will be a complete change to your life and it s possible you will have to accept doing any job in an other field
I guess it s only you who can decide if marriage is more important than your job so no need to get confused think about it ,go ahead and be positive g luck
k
18 March 2009 11:13
"the great love and the great works put in sets of great risks". Dalaï Lama
D
21 March 2009 18:07
I agree,thanx,a short little sentence with thousands meanings.My hat goes down to you.
D
21 March 2009 18:09
Thanx lots for your view point,you said many good things and I agree with you,I think I will be positive and take the step,INshallah all will be well.
Thanx again.
b
24 March 2009 12:00
hi there brother.

well, i think that we shouldn't be bothering you with lots of opinions because the best one is the one you'd make yourself. however, i also think that it depends on what you're willing to sacrifice for? is it Germanny? or is it your wife? knowing this,allows you to make greater steps which you'll never regret.

best regards.
a
30 March 2009 23:19
Hi dreamer 1st!
I was touched by your request of our opnion whether to go to Germany or stay in Morocco as an English teacher.
I ahve read different opinions and they all have left their answer open-ended. After cosedering all the options and having the experience of a long sacrifice in Europe, I would stay put in my Moroccan English teacher job and make the wife move to Morocco. Evenmore if she is a Muslim. I had a friend of mine who married a German and followed his wife to Gemany and after 10 years and 3 children later, I met him in Morocco and when I asked him about the family, he burst in tears and told me that his German wife kicked him out the house, took the children and he is back in Morocco empty handed.
So be very careful and say Alhamdulillah you are still in our beautiful country and with a job. You must be a mardi lwalideen especially if your mother is still around. She is worth 1000's of wives.
Allah bless!
Amazigh.
----------------------------
Walan tarda aanka lyahuda wala nasaara hata tattabiaa millatahum.
m
31 March 2009 21:30
Mothers are important no doubt about that but married life is important too thats the nature of life , even birds fly the nest once they grew little wings, if there is a strong base to any marriage it will be successful no matter which country the couple live in
In my opinion like others said: you need to weigh your priorities, discuss the matter with your wife your married life is like a ship and you are both the captains , think of your move financially emotionally in a very practical way
if i was in your place i won t waste any minute far from my wife life is too short
I am married about 2 years now and can not imagine my life far from my other half

i wish you all the best
Quote
amzigh01
Hi dreamer 1st!
I was touched by your request of our opnion whether to go to Germany or stay in Morocco as an English teacher.
I ahve read different opinions and they all have left their answer open-ended. After cosedering all the options and having the experience of a long sacrifice in Europe, I would stay put in my Moroccan English teacher job and make the wife move to Morocco. Evenmore if she is a Muslim. I had a friend of mine who married a German and followed his wife to Gemany and after 10 years and 3 children later, I met him in Morocco and when I asked him about the family, he burst in tears and told me that his German wife kicked him out the house, took the children and he is back in Morocco empty handed.
So be very careful and say Alhamdulillah you are still in our beautiful country and with a job. You must be a mardi lwalideen especially if your mother is still around. She is worth 1000's of wives.
Allah bless!
Amazigh.
----------------------------
Walan tarda aanka lyahuda wala nasaara hata tattabiaa millatahum.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/31/2009 09:32 by marocain-09.
h
11 April 2009 01:36
hello
I will answer in english even if I dont speak is well.
SO I wasa teacher of spanish for 8 years I let my work and I came to SPain, its very hard the situation . Nobody can help you be sure that you have to resolve it yourself, because every one with his own conditions, and own circumstances. you have to evaluate
1your relation with your wife,
your Situation in morocco and city where you live:
Job situation in germany, and to decide.
I know that state of techer in Morocco is mkiserable, depending of your style of life, if you see that you can change your life, nd you will not be afected with this change, you can Try it

I propose to you, to ask what we call Mise en disponibilité and so yo will have two years to go to germany and to study the situation there, and to decide at last.

I know that is imposible to have it, if not think about to present a Certificat medical de 6 mois and go to try yourfuture there. even if 6 monthes will clariy nothing to you

Forgive my mistakes, I know that there is a lot.
Good luck
Suerte
Salam
D
28 April 2009 11:11
Hi Dreamer First !

I've read a lot of opinions and some have said what I think.
I think you shoud think about it carefully before taking a decision. It 's not that easy to abandon everything to follow someone even if it is your wife. Of course when we get married we must live together and build our projects in family and not with a distance separating us everyday.

You have you job, your family, yours habits over there in Morrocco and by going to Germany you will have to abandon that and start a new life. It will be easy to do if youn find a job once you arrive there and not 6 months or one year later. If it 's the case you will soon get bored and regret your choice and the consequence is that it will have repercussions on your everyday routine with your wife.
It's very difficult for a man to stay at home particularly when his wife works. I'm a woman, I left my job, my family to be with my husband aond I must admit that sometimes it's difficult. My family is in france, I see them about once every two months. I'm in France too but I live far from them...
F
29 April 2009 02:21
Quote
Dreamer1st
Hello,
Im a teacher of English in Morocco,Im so lost and dont know what to do,my wife is living in Germany and Im living here in Morocco,I want your view point,so do you think I have to go and join my wife and leave Morocco and my job? Is it a good idea or not? Am I going to regret it? Is Germany a good country and thus does it deserve my sacrifice? Did anyone of you make such a step or do you know anyone who did it?
Please help me,any help will be so much appreciated.
Thanks to all of you brothers and sisters.
Salam Alaikom.
There was an american saying in the turn of the century (1800's) when all the young men were wondering to move to the west coast or stay east with their families, at that time it was the big gold rush. many came from poor families and never ever visited a city, but they all dreamed of San Francisco and its gold and maybe one day hit it rich.
some left and some stayed, some turned out to become super-rich some became super-poor, even poorer than their parents, but the famous saying stil lives in the american culture today.
GO WEST YOUNG MAN
the worst that can happen to you is that you become poorer than your parents but you can always go back home and become an English teacher again.
but if you don't take the risk, you'll be a teacher for the rest of your life.
want my opinion?
Go west young man
m
6 May 2009 19:00
HEY MAN, UR WIFE IS IN GERMANY, AND YOU ASK DIS QUESTION?? OK, U HAVE UR JOB IN MOROCCO BUT IF I WERE U, I THINK I DIDN'T HESITATE COS' IN GERMANY, U'LL FIND A JOB MORE EASILY THAN IN "BLADI" HONESTLY CHOOSE THE FIRST OPTION GET OUT OF MOROCCO (HIHIHI) AND GO TO LIVE WITH UR WIFE, POOR...SHE'S MAYBE UNHAPPY IN THIS SITUATION AND I THINK YOU TOO... EVEN IF YOU DON'T ACCEPT IT.. SO, I ADVICE U TO LIVE WITH HER; NO MATTER THE COUNTRY; ACCORDING TO ME; I WOULD LIVE WITH MY HUSBAND. BUT IT'S UR LIFE AND I KNOW IT'S VERY DIFFICULT TO TAKE THIS DECISION..
GOOD LUCK

KHEIR INCHALLAH
" Offrir l'amitié à qui veut l'amour, c'est donner du pain à qui meurt de soif. "
F
7 May 2009 00:29
Quote
myriam999
HEY MAN, UR WIFE IS IN GERMANY, AND YOU ASK DIS QUESTION?? OK, U HAVE UR JOB IN MOROCCO BUT IF I WERE U, I THINK I DIDN'T HESITATE COS' IN GERMANY, U'LL FIND A JOB MORE EASILY THAN IN "BLADI" HONESTLY CHOOSE THE FIRST OPTION GET OUT OF MOROCCO (HIHIHI) AND GO TO LIVE WITH UR WIFE, POOR...SHE'S MAYBE UNHAPPY IN THIS SITUATION AND I THINK YOU TOO... EVEN IF YOU DON'T ACCEPT IT.. SO, I ADVICE U TO LIVE WITH HER; NO MATTER THE COUNTRY; ACCORDING TO ME; I WOULD LIVE WITH MY HUSBAND. BUT IT'S UR LIFE AND I KNOW IT'S VERY DIFFICULT TO TAKE THIS DECISION..
GOOD LUCK

KHEIR INCHALLAH
maybe he loves being a teacher, some teachers are crazy..
they think that just because they get the title teacher, they become smart.
it takes more than phd to be smart nevermind some high school grad.
s
12 May 2009 15:23
hi dreamer 1 st
i think that if you really cant live far from your wife
you ve got to make it mate,believe me,you cant just carry on like that with you life
especially that you re a married man
and as for germany its a good country plus if you are an english teacher you will find your place in there,i live in london i ve been to germany many times,and yes they need some english teachers,you can make it there
good luckthumbs up
D
12 May 2009 22:18
Thanx Salma,I think I will make this move and follow my wife,thanx lots.Peace.
F
12 May 2009 23:11
Good move Dreamer, you will never ever regret your decision.
it's the dreamers who constructed the base of civilization and they didn't all come from the same village.
Go west my friend and forget your job.
follow your heart and follow your dreams..
best of luck.
D
13 May 2009 15:05
Hi freethinker,

Thanx for all your words and I hope you are right in that I will never ever regret this move,how come you know Germany is a good place? Have you been there before? Of course I cant live like this far from my wife,is so painful for us both so Inshallah (God willing) I will take this step once I finish my school year here in next July.
Keep in touch.
Peace.
D
13 May 2009 15:07
Thanx to you my friend,I will do what you said and for me marriage,my wife in this case,is more important to me that anything,including my job.
Thanx again for your help.
Peace.
D
13 May 2009 15:08
Great quote with great meaning,thanx to you Kimawa.
Peace.
D
13 May 2009 15:10
The sacrifice is for my precious wife,I will take this move Inshallah,I should thank you for your view point.
peace.
D
13 May 2009 15:12
Thanx again Salma,Yes its so hard to live apart like this,so hard that I cant describe it,especially when there is a strong love shared and felt between the two,like in our case,me and my wife,I will say Bismillah and make this move.
Thank you so much and take care.
Peace.
D
13 May 2009 15:14
Salam Myriam,

You are so true and so right,we are both unhappy,so I will move there in summer,and will start a new life,of course I love Morocco so deeply,but I need to join my wife,that the only way to be together.
Thanx again.
Peace.
D
13 May 2009 15:18
Hello Kellya,
Thanx for sharing your experience with me,of course life is never a bed of roses,our ways are all the time full of thorns and hardship,we got to fight to survive,so I will fight till the end,I will be an adventurer,I will follow my wife and enjoy the following.
Peace.
D
13 May 2009 15:20
Salam Hamouda,

Thanx for your long answer and your english isnt that bad,you write good,well my state here isnt miserable,I make good money and Im happy,the only thing is Im so unhappy to be far from my wife,thats all.Yes I will ask for this Mise en Diponibilite and I will take it from there and see where it will go.
Thanx again .
Peace.
D
13 May 2009 15:22
Hello Marocain,

Thank you,Yes I will weigh my chances and move there,a wife is as worthy as a mother if shes a good wife that can love and respect with no borders.
Thanx.
Peace.
D
13 May 2009 15:26
Hello Amzigh,

Thank you for your view point,I think its so worthy and you are right with all what you said,a mother is precious for me in her own special way,but a wife is precious to me also,because God gave me such a wonderful wife Alhamdolilah.
I will think about it and come out with a decision.
Thanks.
Peace.
a
13 May 2009 16:56
Hello Dreamer1st!

Thank you for for replyig to everyone above.
I have read all your replies and to be honest tears came to my eyes. I can feel how you are yearning for your wife and at the same time your love for your family and country. You are really a very loving person and your wife, your family and your country should be proud to have somebody like you.

The reason I say this because I left my country 4 dcades ago and I still love it like if it was yesterday. I left for different reasons of course. It was more for the studies and find bread but nevertheless I left. I still cry when I go to Morocco and have to leave again but at least at the moment I can afford to go back and forth.

The reason I worry for you is that Europe is not what it used to be and jobs are not as easy to come by.
As Moroccans we were appreciated as good people and good workers. Unfortunately, today is not the case and I do not have to draw you a picture Why?

In your favour Alhamdulillah a wife that loves you, You are a qulified English teacher with a lot of experience. Then with all of these under your arm, I'll still advice you to consider one of the options that brother Hammouda suggested, 'Mise en Diponibiliti'. I do not know how long that lasts but it is a very good suggestion. As for your mother, friends and our lovely country, inchallah, you'll get the job and visit Blad as much as possible.

May Allah Bless you and take a good care of yourself.
A
D
13 May 2009 18:50
Hi there brother,

Thanx again for your kind email,Im so greateful that lots of good people like yourself are helping me right here,yes I replied to anyone who wrote to me,I dont want to ignore any answer,its impolite,so I need this help so bad right now cos Im truly lost in the middle of nowhere and I cant figure out what to do,but Inshallah Allah is by myside and I will find my way out.I know what Europe is no longer the same and even Morocco is no longer the same,life is changing wherever we go,thats a must,you know that I already have some siblings in Europe,one sister and one brother,they are happy there but this doesnt comfort me that I will be happy too,Im not them and they arent me,plus I have a future in Morocco,a future for which I fought for many years,I mean I studied for many years to be a teacher here and you know how hard it is to find a job in Morocco.
Well,I will take this leave without pay I mean what we call La mise en disponibilite,and then wait and see.So as we say (Alkhayro fima Khtaraho Allah) I will do my best and the rest will come from God.
Take care brother,and you must know that Im Amazigh too from the Atlas region and I do speak Tamazight...(:
Peace.
 
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